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Friday, October 19, 2012

YOU'RE Mormon?!?!

Last week our superintendent started what is called "Fan Fridays." That means that we can wear jeans and a t-shirt or polo shirt with a school, district, or university logo. (We have to pay $5 if we do this...the money goes to charity, so I don't mind.)

Today I wore my BYU t-shirt. Go Cougars!! This lady in my office saw my shirt and with the most incredulous sounding voice said: "YOU'RE Mormon?!?!" I don't think she was trying to be rude, but I couldn't believe how shocked she was! Even one of the secretaries commented on how surprised the lady seemed. That struck me because I still consider myself to be "so Mormon" even though I haven't set foot in a chapel in almost 10 years. I'm clean cut, and I don't drink, smoke, or do drugs. I don't think I've ever had someone act shocked when they hear I'm LDS. And before you roll your eyes, no...I'm not some big old queen!! OK, maybe I'm a little queeny, but I'm not in the Richard Simmons category! lol Ah, hell, who am I kidding? I assume most people think I'm gay.

I'm out to my immediate family, close friends, and some co-workers, but it's not something I advertise. To me being gay is one of the many labels that define me. It is not THE label that defines me. If someone asks, I'm honest. Otherwise I don't tell people. Sometimes I've volunteered the information because it was relevant to the conversation, but I don't think it's something that I need to tell everyone. It's funny because I know some people who have to tell EVERYONE. It's like they attach "...and I'm gay" to their name. "Hi, my name is Samuel, and I'm gay."

That reminds me of a character that Jim Carrey (who I normally can't stand) used to do on the old In Living Color show. He played this gay character who had to tell everyone he was gay, no matter the situation. It was funny, but I know people who are like this, and THEY DRIVE ME CRAZY!


Back in my first year teaching I had a student, Tiffany. She was one of those kids who was missing that filter in the brain that tells you what is and isn't appropriate. Well one day as I was getting things ready for school to start, she comes in early. There are a few kids in the room and I'm writing stuff up on the board. Here's our conversation:

Tiffany:  "Do you know what everyone says about you?"
Me: (I slowly turn around and look at her) "No, Tiffany. What do they say about me?"
Tiffany: "Everyone says you're gay."
Me: "Oh, OK." (I turn back around to write on the board)
Tiffany: "Don't you care?!?!"
Me: "Tiffany, do you know how long it's been since I've cared about what 14 year olds say about me behind my back?"
Tiffany: "No."
Me: "Well, I turn 27 in a few months, you do the math."
Tiffany: "Oh..." (Silent)

I think that now my response would be different. I should have looked at her in the eyes and said: "And?" lol

Maybe that's because I live and work in Las Vegas now instead of Utah County. Being outside of the Book of Mormon Belt has emboldened me a little more! Whenever I think of my time teaching in Utah I think that my students probably thought I was a fag, but I don't think they really thought I was gay. I mean, they all knew I was LDS and that I went on a mission. How could a Mormon returned missionary really be gay? I'm sure most of them know better by now.

3 comments:

Duck said...

That's a great story with your student. I bet she about died when you didn't care what she said.

What do you teach? How long have you been teaching? I, too, teach. Jr. High math. Great job. Class sizes are outrageous, akin to what they were when I first began teaching a billion years ago.

Hope all goes well in Nevada. Happy night! Duck

Dean said...

Some of my devout Baptist friends here in NC had more of a challenge accepting that I was a Mormon than accepting I am gay. They think you can pray away the gay but can't pray away the Mormon :)

I have mixed feelings about Utah. I have been there twice since coming out. It is easier to be out in Salt Lake than it is to be out in Greensboro NC. No one is out where I live, and several friends are concerned about my safety since I have come out. I have not had anyone threaten me, but some formerly friendly people cannot talk to me anymore.

I wore my U of U sweatshirt when we had college days at work. It did not go over well the year that the U knocked UNC Chapel Hill out of the NCAA tournament.

James said...

@Duck--She thought I was just being rude. lol I'm not in the classroom teaching now, I'm now one of those evil evil administrators. :) I taught Spanish for 12 years though, 10 years at the HS level and two at the MS level. You wanna talk about class sizes? We have teachers here with classes in the high 40's or even with 50 kids!!

@Dean I will be polite and not say anything snarky about the U. ;) I do say that sometimes I miss living in Utah. There were more people "like me" there. Here in Vegas if you don't live at the clubs, you don't exist. lol